Friday, November 30, 2007

The Best Medicine

Lets all laugh at the Ottawa Senators. Well, unless of course you are a Sens fan (in that case I pity you).

Why, you ask, should I, a Leafs fan, be laughing at one of the premier NHL teams playing today?

A five game loosing skid is why. A skid longer than any suffered by my Buds have suffered this year (so far). "But what about that fantastic 12 game winning streak start the Sens had?" you ask. What about it? Sure its given you a nice cushion so this little streak is not as great a worry to you as it probably should be, but guess what? Your still on a 5 game loosing streak and I will take any opportunity I can to point and laugh at the Sens. I mean sure, The Leafs are having a, lets say, mediocre season. But then no one sane picked the Leafs to be anything more than slightly better the mediocre this year. The Sens on the other hand, have again been heralded as the best thing since sliced bread, so it means a little more than when the bread slicing machine Ottawa Senators turn into a device dull enough to have trouble with bread pudding. Delicious bread pudding.

Plus I just hate the Senators.

So haha.

Ha.

I'm not bitter.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

...

You know what?

FUCK!

Thats what.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Prayer For The Refugee

The Leafs are one very bad win away from some major changes, changes that in the long run would probably be good for the team, the fans and the organization (It couldn't really hurt at this point).

But please, any god who may be out there don't let it be against the Montreal Canadians, we have suffered enough.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Think Happy Thoughts

To distract myself from the current state of the Leafs, I have indulged in a little fantasy.
What five players would I most want to see in the Blue and White? Who would be the best fit? Who would help the team out the most?

5 - Nicklas Lidstrom: Arguably the best defenseman ever, both an offensive threat and defensive horse. He'd be the perfect partner for Bryan Mistakes, and an even better fit with Kabby, hell you could put this guy with Herpes and he'd still get the job done.

4- Jarome Iginla: One of the next leaders in the Wendel Clark vein, only more talented. Tough as a two dollar steak and can put up the points as good as almost anyone. A true leader, a true player, totally under valued outside of the west.

3- Deon Phaneuf: A force of nature on the blue line, hits anything and everything, hard. A cannon of a shot and excellent defensively. The franchise defenseman every team wishes they had.

2- Rick Nash: The best sniper in the league, hands down. Put him on a line with Sundin or Wellwood (or even better both) and its 50+ goals a season, easy. Fast enough to keep up with Blake, creative and wary enough to deal with Bryan Mistakes passes. Would be the Hart and Richard trophy winner every year on the Leafs (or any team with a half decent play maker to pair him with).

1- Vincent Lecavalier: Arguably the best, most complete player in the NHL. He does everything and he does it all well, better than anyone else actually (he's probably a better goalie than Raycroft). Will be in the top 10 in scoring for the next 10 years. At least.

Will any of these players ever done a Leaf jersey? Not likely, but it is nice to dream isn't it?

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Roller Coaster...Of Leafs

You give me that nauseous feeling in my tummy.

Ahhh shit, No!, that's wrong, damn
Rollercoaster of Leafs
Say what?
Rollercoaster, yeah (ooh ooh, ooh ooh)
Oh, JFJ, you know what I'm talkin' about
Rollercoaster of Leafs (Leaf rollercoaster, Jr)
Oh, yeah, it's Rollercoaster time
watchen' you is really wild
Oh, it′s just a Leaf rollercoaster
Step right up and get your tickets!

Chorus:
You Leafs are like a Rollercoaster Mats, Pony, I want a win, yeah (awawawawawaw)
You Leafs are like a Rollercoaster Antro, Razor, I want a win, yeah

Move it over Stralman 'cause Woz is an ass kisser!
Out Of Possition like Clinton's zip-zip-zipper
1,2,1,2,3, I′ve got a ticket so win for me
Carlo go down on the injury-go-round
All is lost on The ACC grounds
Gill go slow, Blake go fast
Wellwood's hands gonna deek your ass.

Rollercoaster of Leafs
Say what?
Rollercoaster,
yeah (ooh ooh, ooh ooh)
Rollercoaster of Leafs
Can we get off our Leaf rollercoaster?

Chorus:
You Leafs are like a Rollercoaster Tucker, Kabby, I want a win, yeah
You Leafs are like a Rollercoaster Steen, Stajin, I want a win

Yeah.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Batboy Lives!


Batboy has surfaced! He is making his NHL debut for the Boston Bruins tonight against the Leafs!

Monday, November 19, 2007

Resiliance

There was a discussion at my work last night trying to classify Leaf fans. Words like gullible, optimistic, and loyal were tossed around. My answer, and clear winner was resilient.

Look what we have endured, 40 + years without a cup, 2 years with out playoffs, 29 other groups of fans spouting hate towards us and our team.

But here we are, as strong as ever, as proud as ever, as loyal as ever.

If there ever is a nuclear war, the only thing that will survive will be cockroaches and Leaf fans, you cannot destroy us, you cannot weaken us.

We are what true fans are supposed to be, Die Hard.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Well Now.....

Where do I begin.?
Do I discus my disgust with Andy Woz'herpes?
Do I touch on Raycroft's Paris Hiltonesque five hole?
Do I punch an Ottawa Senators fan (because that is all they are really good for anyway)?

Well no.

Here at Die Hard we like to be positive, we like to find that diamond in the rough and polish it till she sparkles like the twinkle in Jessica Alba's eye.

So what good can be found after a third straight loss, and an up coming game tonight against the bain of my existence?

Kyle Wellwood, thats what. This kid is the real deal. He is on fire. You cannot hope to stop The Wellwood, only to contain him.
Also Jiri Tlusty. The kid didn't miss a beat after all the media BS thrown at him, I don't care if he is gay, he could get a rainbow tattooed across his forehead for all I care as long as he plays like he did last night.
Alexander Steen has become a nigh unstoppable force along the boards and is playing with an edge that he seems to have syphoned out of Tucker.
The Tosk, he should be back tonight....God let him be back tonight.
Bryan Mistake was also good....Did I actually say that? Damn, I need to get some sleep....

Thursday, November 15, 2007

My Two Cents

Jiri Tlustly's photographs.

Whatever, can we move on now? Please? Focus on something important like our teams defensive nakedness? You know, the one that actually has something to do with hockey?

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Carlo, Where Art Thou?

Save us from Bryan Mistakes, Andy Wozbadpositioning, and Ian Mc Pinches Too Much.

Amen.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Welcome Home

Home again, home again, mother of god we are home again.

But it's against the Hapless Habs, so it's a good thing. The Leafs have owned the Habs 10-4 since the end of the lock out and 2-0 since the beginning of our present season.

Also tonight, the Habs have thrown 'El Savliour des Canadiens' Cary Price against the Buds because Huet has been less than effective. The Leafs interject Stefan Kronwall into the line up as well to replace Pavel Kubina, who tore his MCL at a practice.

Master Bates Battaglia was also seen practicing on the fourth line with Tucker and Bell.
I can't wait to see what Bell can do when he finally gets back into the NHL swing.

Go Leafs Go.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Back From Firewall Purgatory

Finally, my firewall issues have been resolved. For some reason they didn't like this site and wouldn't allow me to update, and or post.
But That has been fixed.

Now down to bid-nez.

I hate the shootout. I always have, and not just because the Leafs suck at it on a rediculous scale.
Hockey is a team sport, so the logic of placing the outcome of the game (and that ever so valueble extra point) on a solo effort by players takes away from the game.
The Leafs roller coaster season continues, blow out, close loss, shutout against the Slugs, stupid shoot out loss. Next game will probably be a blow out for the Leafs (it is against the Habs and that would be ever so delicious).
Good news is, most of the team is Healthy, save the eventual name-sake for chronic injuries Carlo De Coliocovo. Tucker is looking feisty again, Wellwood is looking shifty and creative, McCabe isn't looking gawd freakin' awful and Mark Bell is punnishing bitches left right and center with some nice body checking.
All needed now is some chemistry and a continued and improved defensive co-operation.

The Team is on the verge of a breakout, I can feel it.