Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Best Case Scenario

Hey Y'all, you know what I like? I'm sure you have a general understanding as I tend to be blunt with such things, especially this one, I love me a good list.
Speaking of lists (segwaaaaaaaaay) here's a relevant one!

Things I want to see on draft day/ free agency, with detail

DO

- trade for the 5th over all pick from Atl for Kabby, Stajan/Grabovski/2nd round pick package
- Use 5th over all to draft Schenn 2.0 or Kane (whoever LA doesnt take)
- Use 7th over all to draft Cowen
- Trade Kubby + 3rd rounder to Florida for their 14th over all pick and a prospect
- Use 14th over all pick to draft Ryan Ellis, Zach Kassian or Carter Ashton (who ever is best left)
- Make a big play for Jay Bowmeister (if Kabby goes) for 5.5 mill for 4 years
- Make a play for Bauchemin for 3.75 Mill for 3 years
- Sign Travis Moen for 2-2.5 Mill for 3 years
- Sign the Monster for max allowed salary for 2 years
- Sign Grabovski (if not traded) for a MAXIMUM (and thats pushing it) 3 mill for 3 years.
- resign Pogge for a 2 year contract, remind him this is his last chance.
- put Remier on the Marlies, challange Pogge, dethrone him if necessary

DONT

- trade up for the top 3, will cost way too much
- trade Poni, he will have a break out season
- trade the vesa, he isnt as bad as people say, and his value can only go up
- trade down, there is too much tallent at 7 to let get away
- Make a ploy for Camallari, he will be too expensive
- Persue the Sedins, they may be elite point a game players, but down the road (especially 5+ years) they will be a liability of grandious perportions
- Make a move for Komeserik, douchebags need not apply.
- Give Pogge ANY NHL time (catastrophic injuries to both Leaf goalies excepted) until he earns it
- get off track with the rebuild, no matter what happens, don't rush it. We're building a dynasty here, not a one shot deal.

Token Insanity

designer sunglasses
CRAZY MONKEY APPLE PANTS!

Saturday, June 13, 2009

All The Cool Kids Are Doing It


Ubiquitous Cup Winner Post Extravaganza!

Pens is Winner, Ha-Ha-Ha
Stupid Redwings
Yay Hal Gill, Cup is now scared of heights
Hossa is curse, cleans with fire!
End of the Crosby dirt beard
Here come the draft

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Intangebles

There has been much talk round yon Barilkosphere about said upcoming draft, who do we want Burkie to go after, who brings the best fit in skill set, what is plausible?
Well I am all about intangibles, so I have examined, studied and spent several minuites coming up with some that you might not have thought about for the top 10 ranked players that may or may not be a Toronto Maple Leaf next month.

10 - Nazem Kadri - He likes big butts, and he cannot lie, who am I to argue with that logic?

9 - Dmitri Kulikov - Has dreams of playing with his idols Kaberle and Kubina on an empty netter six man power play forming the KKK wall!

8- Oliver Ekman-Larsson - Has a running bet with MSP for who will be the greatest player with three names in this draft

7 - Jared Cowen - his insatiable appetite for whole oxen will cure the plauge of them that surround the GTA

6 - Brayden Schenn - Instantly makes Toronto the undisputed sexiest city in the world, take THAT Montreal and Madrid!

5 - M. Svensson-Paajarvi - Has what some call Magnus Sensory Perception (or MSP) which means he has an uncanny ability to sense Magnus'

4 - Evander Kane - He can recite every mighty ducks movie by memory, isn't affraid to bust out the flying V during games, but that loses some of its effect when no one else on the team participates.

3 - Matt Duchene - Because of a mild understanding, he gets everyone of his sticked blessed by a Llama by getting it to spit on the blade. Seems to be working.

2 - Victor Hedman - Knows how to swear at opponents in 7 different languages so he can chirp at anyone, except the French, because he doesnt consider that a proper language.

1 - John Tavares - He looks like Steve Dangle, thats gotta count for something.